Category: News

‘The best way to control the opposition is to lead it ourselves.’ – Vladimir Lenin

In 2015 Shanley Kain responded to an inquiry from Breitbart by admitting to a “misogynist, slut-shaming, queer-phobic, abusive, racist, ableist and classist,” past, as well as characterizing her previous relationship with the notorious white supremacist Andrew Auernheimer with the same excessive candor, “I’ve fucked a bunch of assholes, I’ve practiced sadomasochism and there are nudes out there.”

Shanley Kane had launched the curious Model View Culture publication just a year prior to these admissions, a magazine with the stated purpose of advocating for diversity in the tech industry.

In one co-authored piece shot through with Shanley’s semi-parodic style, the magazine undermined and labeled organizations putting resources towards victims of online harassment with the ridiculous term “Non-Profit Industrial Complex,” suggesting instead that readers should “support and fund individual activists,” and work on “the development of alternatives.” According to her ex-boyfriend Auernheimer, better known in trolling communities as weev, online abuse and racism was the glue that held their relationship together.

Model View Culture and Shanley would stir concern and consternation, appealing to sensitive audiences about terrible social ills such as computer terminology like “master” and “slave.” When convenient, Shanley would play either the role of the ultimate and perpetual victim or the vicious troll, hurling abuse with the same practiced skill of her ex-boyfriend. For two years, Kane’s absurd antics were an inescapable topic at Silicon Valley water coolers.

Dan Lyon of Valleywag expressed confusion in retrospect, portraying her interest in social justice as a hoax or even a novel form of entertainment, “It’s possible that the Shanley Show was not a hoax. Maybe Kane really is a sincere but deeply troubled person.”

Before her stint in controlled opposition social justice at Model View Culture, Shanley marketed Silicon Valley products with several firms where she brushed shoulders with elites like Peter Thiel. Thanks to the reporting of Barrett Brown, formerly of the Byline Times, evidence of Auernheimer’s employment by Peter Thiel has come to light, raising concern about Shanley’s possible connections.

Dr. Angstrom H. Troubador weighed in, “How does an internet troll from Arkansas best known for a website showing a gaping asshole wind up running propaganda operations for a tech billionaire? Not a lot of answers to that question, but I can think of one at least: Shanley Kane.”

THE USEFUL IDIOTS?

Teaming up with Rocco Castoro, a previous employee at Tim Pool’s SCNR and Editor-in-Chief at Vice, Brown turned his investigations towards pranksters, activists, imageboard administrators, journalists, and social media commenters. The duo’s harassment, lewd sexual comments, fedjacketing, personal insults, pedojacketing, and outrageous antics serve to defame and depict their targets as members of an underground network of agitators for Peter Thiel taking marching orders from Andrew Auernheimer. Brown and Auernheimer have been personal friends since 2007, notably corresponding on the PC video game platform Steam.

[Editor’s note: Castoro and Brown have targeted every writer at Internet Chronicle, living or dead, with one stark exception: Tyler Bass, a former writer at Internet Chronicle, who participated in Peter Thiel’s racist facial recognition company alongside Auernheimer. He was previously fired from Internet Chronicle for pissing in a tent at the yearly office retreat.]

Kevin Gallagher, director of Free Barrett Brown and late lieutenant at Brown’s Project PM, also managed servers for Transparency Toolkit, a Thiel Fellowship open-source software system that aims to aid investigative journalists in “authoritarian contexts” by combining various digital tools, a system used for Castoro’s “data-driven” approach to investigative journalism.

Brown contacted Internet Chronicle regarding this story with the chilling demand, “Don’t reach out to Shanley or mention her or even look at her ever again.”

Model View Culture shut down shortly after Trump’s inauguration in 2017, with Shanley writing, “although Model View Culture remains financially sustainable in its current form, I’m ready to move on,” adding that her passions had moved her to write and publish a book that would strike at the heart of “tech industry empire.” No such book was ever published.

“‘Sometimes a girl just wants to be defiled,'” Auernheimer quoted Kane. He would later brag to friends that he “Fucked her with her family mezuzah scroll.”

Shanley currently maintains a blog nominally opposing so-called “tech fascism” and Peter Thiel in the familiar half-parodic format of Model View Culture. As recently as June of 2026, Shanley complained about Peter Thiel receiving unfair media coverage relating to his visit to Argentina, “…publications as ‘reputable’ as the New York Times, are getting away with reporting at the level of the National Examiner. This is not a time for hysteria, tabloid writing, and indulgence in fantasy.” Shanley’s alternative rallying cry to the news media’s flashy Antichrist billionaire?

“A bank is a weapon.”

At the scummy bottom of TikTok’s darkest reaches, X-rated shows from flat-earth promoters bounce back and forth between a few dozen ban evading moral monsters who want to teach children that the government, their parents, doctors, and teachers are all lying to them about everything.

“The globers used to be the ones crashing out,” Nicci the flat-earther whined. “We need to move past this op,” she sneered, “and it is an op, it is a fake thing that they’ve done to us.”

Official harassment and abuse alerts bounce across the screen as dunces who didn’t complete high school curse while performing physics demonstrations, sometimes waving empty toilet paper tubes full of trash or gesticulating at disc-shaped lids hanging on a fence. Calculations are scratched into tattered notebooks, freehand geometry spelling out illegible hatreds and angular fears.

“My grandaddy married meemaw when she was 14, are you gonna say he’s a pedophile? You really gonna say that about my grandaddy?” Shape Commander’s bold challenge was met with stunned silence.

Previously a minor figure, Shape has catapulted to infamy over the past weeks, platformed by flat-earthers for countless uninterrupted hours to push his various abhorrent views. Shape’s central fear is that the white race will be replaced by “sub-Saharans” and should instead revert into a state of nature conceptualized as ultimate barbarity, even targeting young girls like his meemaw for the purpose of increasing white survivability.

“People are just machines,” Wizard the Healer of Gods told listeners, “and women are babymaking machines,” He ranted in defense of Shape, lockstep with the general flat-earth community. Wizard admitted that he recently served time for menacing his wife, family, and police by breaking dining plates with his psychic powers during a domestic call. Neither he nor the immediate flat-earth community see anything wrong with this as he purchased the plates with his own money, and they were his to break.

In spite of being 6,000 years old and possessing telekinetic abilities, Wizard’s repertoire is limited to accusing others of psychological projection and calling them Nazis. “If you can convince someone of the flat earth, you can convince them of anything,” Shape Commander famously proclaimed, tacitly admitting that the flat-earth is no more than a sugar-coating for his poisoned fascist pill.

While resistance to this deranged form of extremist bigotry hasn’t yet catalyzed into the highly funded, well-organized counter-movement of the flat-earth’s paranoid waking dream, memes and humor remain the best cure for their fear and lies. “Globecrusher,” a prominent flat-earth TikTok host, is embroiled in “swolegate” after he was caught red handed photoshopping his face onto a bodybuilder with a physique he could only dream of achieving. Considering the dark direction focusing on children, such petty and vain lies are a light interlude for the ghastly horrors unraveling just next door.

Enoch of TikTok, treated like a God among flat-earthers, rides his bike into the show as the shirtless cool guy, pamphleteering flat-earth schlock with his big evil off-leash dog sniffing at passing baby carriages like dogdishes and sending women running in fear. He’ll kill his way onto smaller flat-earth lives and admin abuse the show to death with muting and bullying, sailing right out once it’s taken a few hits for harassment and is reduced to dead air.

Better known as Nathan Edward Thompson, Enoch’s fame is proof-positive that his reputation as a child-targeting predatory creep is actually a benefit for his reputation with the flat-earth community. In 2020, Thompson was arrested after screaming at children in the playground of a local elementary school, expressing the intent to “flat-smack” them. He remains among the most influential and respected leaders of the flat-earth community due to his record of targeting children.

“We need to start blackmailing the anti-flat-earthers. They’re like, the type to have hard drives full of furry stuff and you just like, tell them to stop and if they don’t we’ll just ruin their lives, man,” Thompson muttered in anger, balling his fist up tightly, a solitary crocodile tear running down his cheek. Finances are not looking too bright for the grifters at the top of the flat-earth pyramid.

“Oh we won’t convince this generation, but the next one will be for the flat-earth, I’m sure of that,” Spoiled Foil yowled, vocals fried like a fish at Long John Silver’s. Foil’s sister has had to cut ties with her, the 16-hour-per-day flat-earth obsession ruining all attempts at authentic communication and sisterhood. Foil is among the most respected flat-earthers, the alienation from her family only serving as another mark of pride and advancement into the highest levels of the evil cult.

But now that the flat-earth cult is shrinking its most heinous zealots are desperate, willing to take more risks and get more explicit with their goals. “They’re still a growing threat to our children, so we’re going to do to them what we did to Scientology, and maybe much more,” a representative for the Anonymous hacker collective told the Internet Chronicle, “We won’t say when, we won’t say how, but let’s just say they will soon find it quite impossible to spread divisive messages of hate and distrust. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.”

JERUSALEM—Fans mourn the loss of Ethan Klein, cult YouTube phenom and podcast host, following a fatal cardiac episode.

Klein built an online empire with his “H3H3” brand – later shortened to “H3” – combining a unique blend of celebrity gossip and online trolling. As his star rose, Klein leveraged his gains into the “Teddy Fresh” fashion line – whose stylings centered childhood innocence and play. Many however found his public persona to be distasteful, often citing Klein’s lurid fixation on the opposite sex. Where H3 satirized targets for their womanly shortcomings, Klein himself fell prey for a very different vulnerability: his Judaism.

The backlash was co-ordinated in the belly of the grimm web, where legions of suggestible imageboard posers were directed to enact Judaism-related abuse at the behest of Daniel Keem “Star,” while the lion’s share of the trolling was spear-headed by alt-right darling Ricky_Vaughn99. Klein defied the hateful stereotyping with a wave of frivolous lawsuits, but it just wasn’t enough.

After a decade of turbulence, the Kleins took a sabbatical to Tel Aviv, offering moral support to relatives in the IDF amidst regional tensions. When President Donald Trump declared hostilities open, panic broke out as Iran announced the first missile salvo.

“Oh shit! This is it! This is the big one!” Klein reportedly exclaimed, before fighting his way to the bathroom. After an hour spent incapacitated with his bowel, concerned family checked in, but found Klein had expired in the tumult.

Ethan is survived by his wife Hila Klein and their three sons. She attributes her husband’s failing health to a decade plus of cyber abuse.

“It just sucks, you know? We’ve had to deal with these people for as long as we’ve been online. Ethan had Tourettes, and I watched as he degenerated in front of my eyes. New ticks and spasms came about the worse the abuse got. We’d get prank calls from people claiming to be Aryan nation or domestic terrorists. At one point we had a visit from the FBI regarding a credible bomb threat. But ever since October 7th these progressives started harassing us as well. In fact, they pretty much took it over. They tried to get CPS to take our children away by saying we were eating dog faeces. Then they started turning our friends and collaborators against us, first Hasan Piker, then Ian Jomha. I’ve been working on this make-up line for two years but they harassed my staff till they all quit, it’s practically dead on launch. Now this. My husband gone. My children without a father. I guess they finally got what they wanted!”

Chronicle reached out to Ian Jomha for an explanation on his position, his anger was stark, “look, I didn’t like the guy by the end, it’s no secret. The feuding got petty, I’ll admit, but that shit isn’t just one-sided.”

“That shit isn’t just one-sided.”

Jomha described a lengthy tit-for-tat that culminated in an unlikely irony:

“My wife and I do commentary on 90 Day Fiance on our twitch stream. Well one of the cast this season was an Iranian marrying his way into the US, but the whole time he won’t shut up about how glorious America is and how oppressive Iran is. It’s like, dude, they have aircraft carriers en route to the gulf of Oman, are you kidding me? This is blatant propaganda! Of course I’m calling that shit out!”

Klein seized on the opportunity and brought the Iranian in question – Mahdi Jahromi – onto his H3 Podcast. As Jahromi told of the regime’s brutal whippings, Klein introduced him to a very western form of punishment; the humiliation ritual.

“Come on dude, look at him, he’s faking it! He’s not anti-war, he’s just saying it for the pussy!”

Jomha was resolute in his stance, but it just wasn’t enough. Quickly, the very same nihilists that hounded Klein into a decades long mental health spiral now turned on him for insufficient jingoism.

“This is the worst thing in the world to say I told you so about, but, well, shit, I told him so!” Jomha was audibly despondent on the call, verging on tears, “what’s it all worth, man? I used to work with this guy. Then he starts crashing out over the genocide and everyone’s like, what the fuck. I tried explaining to him what the military were doing, but he treated it like it’s just more gossip. There he is waving the Shah’s flag on his podcast. I’d just about written him off, his brain was so scrambled by propaganda. Then this war actually breaks out, just as I warned him, and then his heart fails? On the damn toilet? I mean, I wanted the last laugh, sure, but not like this… Not like this…”

While Jomha’s emotions on the matter were palpable, many in the comment-o-sphere attribute this to firebrand wife; Anisa Jomha, for whom he is accused of serving as a mouth piece. Chronicle reporters reached out to Jomha (Anisa) separately, but were astonished by her doctrine,  “I spit on that Zionist pig’s grave!”

When pressed for specifics, Anisa deferred to modern history. “Qaddafi’s teachings still hold truth here, we must pursue the Third Universal Theory now more than ever,” she said. “What do you think happens exactly when the Islamist yoke finally falters? Tehran has been modernising for years, cultural standards soften despite what Zionist vermin claim. Do you expect them to just kowtow to yet more fanatical hicks? No! True liberation for Iran will come only at the hands of the People’s Congress, and with them, the fall of Baal, his acolytes, and the dream of Babylon’s rebirth. DEATH TO AMERICA! DEATH TO THE EPSTEIN CABBAL!”

When asked for any final thoughts on the drama, Jomha was curt, “I don’t know, maybe if he’d just cleaned up after his dog none of this would have happened.”