Category: News

President Obama announced Sunday that he will be participating in #OccupyWallStreet, a loosely-defined protest movement rallying against corporate greed. White House Press Secretary Jay Carney spoke to the press, “The president has become frustrated with his puppet masters in big business. He will be joining #OccupyWallStreet to display solidarity with others who are losing the struggle against corporate power.”

Mainstream corporate media has been slow in reporting this startling announcement from the White House, leading protest supporters to sling accusations of an orchestrated media blackout. Expert media analyst Angstrom H. Troubadour explained the situation in clearer terms, “There’s no media blackout. It’s just that no one really cares about Obama anymore. Hope has died and change is just a thing starving college graduates beg for on the streets, in hopes that they can make their next student loan payment.”

Protesters were less than optimistic about Obama’s announcement, expressing the sentiment that the president did not really intend to defy his overlords. Protester Anna Gomez explained, “It’s like, almost a thousand of us got arrested and now he wants to join? Couldn’t be more obvious he’s just doing it for the votes.”

President Obama announced Sunday that he will be participating in #OccupyWallStreet, a loosely-defined protest movement rallying against corporate greed. White House Press Secretary Jay Carney spoke to the press, “The president has become frustrated with his puppet masters in big business. He will be joining #OccupyWallStreet to display solidarity with others who are losing the struggle against corporate power.”

Mainstream corporate media has been slow in reporting this startling announcement from the White House, leading protest supporters to sling accusations of an orchestrated media blackout. Expert media analyst Angstrom H. Troubadour explained the situation in clearer terms, “There’s no media blackout. It’s just that no one really cares about Obama anymore. Hope has died and change is just a thing starving college graduates beg for on the streets, in hopes that they can make their next student loan payment.”

Protesters were less than optimistic about Obama’s announcement, expressing the sentiment that the president did not really intend to defy his overlords. Protester Anna Gomez explained, “It’s like, almost a thousand of us got arrested and now he wants to join? Couldn’t be more obvious he’s just doing it for the votes.”

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Except it’s not trolling. Everyone knows what’s going on and all the true newfags instantly figure out all the transparent inside jokes. The “newfags” who fall for these jokes are just getting off on trolling oldfags. /b/ can’t stop suckling on its own flaccid cock.