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New Wikileaks emails confirm Clinton brass ‘twiddled the knobs’ of DNC outcome

Julian Assange is back online. Photo: Wikileaks
Julian Assange is back online. Photo: Wikileaks

LONDON–Julian Assange’s oldest love of “crushing bastards” could soon include “crushing bitches” too, after new documents released by Wikileaks show collusion between Hillary Clinton, Clinton Foundation administrators, and Democratic National Committee treasurers.

Everyone but Lee Iacocca has their money on Clinton, given that even weapons manufacturers stand to gain from a Clinton presidency – unphased by her perceived challenges to small arms rights – because she is better known in the military tech world as “the enabler,” a hopeful puppet of military profit strategy.

A leaked Boeing email calls Clinton “a real drone saleswoman,” adding, “This broad could sell airline tickets to birds.”

Clinton’s subtle nods to drone warfare expansion promise a new cycle of state and civil terrorism.

Lockheed-Martin stocks show signs of growth after a group of American war machine investors bet on a permanent battleground for our children and grandchildren. And that’s just the subject line.

The body of the texts is damning indeed. You won’t believe the sins!

File Photo: Hillary Clinton shows dominance by gnashing her teeth.
File Photo: Hillary Clinton shows dominance by gnashing her teeth at a voter.

“Hillary’s a dead ringer,” Trump told CNN on Thursday. “She’s a puppet of the anti-gun liberal hippies, and oh, did I mention she’s a crook? You want a guy like me, who’s a puppet pretending to be against everything she is. I’m the guy you want. And, do I need to say it? She’s a woman. And I think I’ve made myself clear how I feel about women. Nobody respects women more than me.”

Clinton reassured everyone that she is for guns, and for war, and that nothing in the emails suggests she played any significant role in the corruption of the Democratic National Committee, nor does she have any inappropriate ties to Wall Street not already explained by her daughter’s three million dollar wedding. Clinton went so far as to double down on what FOX News pundits referred to as ‘weak rhetoric’ by slamming Putin with promises of a No Fly Zone over Syria, enhanced by a first-strike tactical nuclear option.

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Christopher Nemelka: My Guardian Angel

womans-world

When Internet Chronicle reader, Marilyn Blake, of Cuthbert, Georgia, was suffering from gross ignorance, her guardian angel came to her aid! She writes:

I’ve always been in perfect health, so I was devastated when, after a regular checkup, doctors diagnosed me with breast cancer. The doctors told me that I needed to undergo surgery post-haste!

The procedure went well – lopped off both my tits – but my recovery took longer than anticipated because after being discharged from the hospital, I found myself unable to sleep for more than 12 or 16 hours at a time, as I am wont to do. I was overwhelmed with fear that my titty cancer would return, even though I no longer have breasts. The less I slept, the more paranoid I became. I am such a woman![pullquote]When I prayed for help, Christopher Nemelka came to my bedside, saying he doesn’t need Anonymous, or his fucking wife![/pullquote]

One night, after tossing and turning for hours, I got out of bed and went into the kitchen for a cup of tea. An hour or so later, I went back to my room, and as I lay down and closed my eyes, I cried out, “God, please help me to sleep–I feel fucking retarded right now. Oh my God!”

Suddenly, I felt a presence in the room. Slowly opening my eyes, I saw a man dressed in white with a gentle smile and sleepy eyes standing at the foot of my bed! He seemed to be talking to someone behind me, saying: “If we wrap a length of pantyhose around her arm, and inject her with heroin, this advanced human will sleep soundly.”

The next thing I remember was feeling as though I’d been placed into my mother’s arms. Sleep came to me like a best friend, and I sank into the softness of her arms.

Many days later, I awoke to find myself covered from my neck to toes in a glaze of semen. The love of our Lord! I called for my husband and asked if he had came buckets over me in the night, but he hadn’t. Suddenly, I remembered the man in white and knew that God had sent Christopher Nemelka to help me.

Since that time, I have slept peacefully every night and fully recovered from the cancer. Sometimes, when I meditate on that moment, I can still see the man in white with bloodshot eyes, and I know he is my guardian angel.

“How fortunate Marilyn is to have seen, felt and been injected by her guardian angel!” says Angstrom Troubadour, Ph.D. “We all have personal angels by our side, watching over and caring for us. For me, that angel is Ronald Reagan. All we need to do is ask for their help, as Marilyn did. After all, much like the free market, God and the angels can’t intervene into our free will–we must invite their help.

“There’s an old spiritual saying: ‘Do not stand at the foot of the bed of an ill person, for that location is reserved for Christopher Nemelka, and his new book The Lone and Dreary World, available wherever books are sold.’ Marilyn’s story reminds me of this, with her newly single guardian angel (Nemelka’s wife and kids just don’t get what being an angel is all about) dutifully injecting her with heroin and dilaudid.

“Whenever you are having trouble sleeping, pray to Nemelka, like Marilyn did. The angels may not use a physical opiate to comfort you, but they definitely will blanket you with their love.”

“Nemelka says: I don’t need my wife, my soon-to-be ex wife!  Why bother with the expectations of relationships?!  Hell yeah!  SPEND MY TIME AND MONEY ON ME!'”

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Politics Reviews

New Donald Trump Book ‘Grabbing Pussies’ Hits Store Shelves Monday

NEW YORK — “Readers won’t know what hit ’em,” Donald Trump told The Internet Chronicle on Saturday. "It'll blindside 'em. This book is gonna hit you so hard, reading it will literally make you retarded."

Trump said he reached out to internetchronicle.org/ to discuss the latest in what appears to be the largest public relations stunt in American history.

Trump clarified remarks made in the "leaked" audio actually were prepared statements written to hype his new book, "Grabbing Pussies."Donald Trump: Grabbing Pussies

“I wanted people to see how I did it,” Trump said. “How I turned a small loan into a booming political franchise. How I walked right up to the country like it was an ATM, and how I just reached out. And grabbed its pussy.”

Mike Pence described his own shock at the book reveal as “apoplectic.” Pence said he hadn’t seen such gross political misconduct since as far back as 2014, when former Va. governor Bob McDonnell and his wife were indicted for selling political favors to Anatabloc salesman Johnnie Williams. Pence said he looks for the same from former Va. governor Tim Kaine.

“Political favor is not to be sold,” Pence said. “It is to be stolen, like an election. That’s democracy.”

An inconsolable Pence did not attend a function in Wisconsin, and could not be reached for further comment.

Look for Donald Trump’s Grabbing Pussies everywhere books are sold, on sale Nov. 2.

[Editor’s Note: Lebal Drocer’s official stance is such that: People are property, and women belong in the crosshairs of male aggression and affection, not positions of power.]

Grabbing Pussies is a Lebal Drocer Production.

internetchronicle.org/ and her subsidiaries are property of Lebal Drocer, Inc.